Formula For a Successful Thai Soap Opera

If you want to produce or direct a successful Thai soap opera here is what you will need;

Gather 5 males and 5 females who have recently had plastic surgery to enlarge their noses. Ensure that all can yell at the top of their lungs, the women in shrill voices, and are able to cry on demand. Toss in a couple of cute, rich kids that are spoiled rotten and get what they want by stomping their feet and holding their breath. Add a transvestite or two for some comedy relief. Make sure that they are flamboyant, over exaggerate everything.

Ensure that your plots involve cheating, back-stabbing, lying, getting drunk, shady business deals, gun fights, stealing, and infidelity. Sign on about 50 companies and place their products everywhere on the set. They can be displayed as photos, in stores, kitchens and living rooms. Make these as blatant as possible.

No problem in your soap opera can be resolved through any form of communication other than yelling. Problem resolution is usually handled by fist fights or gun battles.

Cartoon slide whistles and other sound effects need to added to emphasize the already overly dramatic acting.

Your cast must be able to carry on conversations with themselves to further explain what is going on to the viewing audience. Add a couple of maids to your character roster using them as snoops and as the occasional minor wife.

If your ratings slip, bring back someone killed in an earlier episode as a ghost to haunt the main start. If no one has been killed, just add a couple of ghosts as Thai people are extremely superstitious.

This is a bit tongue in cheek, but Thai soap operas are the absolute worst display of what goes on in a Thai household. Granted, America soaps are not much better, but Thai men and women are mesmerized by these shows and they have absolutely no value other than relief from everyday problems.

I just wish that they would break from the stereotypes, have positive role models, and teach something of value. But then, no one would watch the TV shows in Thailand.

Larry Westfall is a retired expat living in Thailand and avoids watching Thai TV by hunting with his metal detector at Thailand's beaches

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